Tag Archives: girls aloud

10 Years On Girls Aloud Are Still Amazing, Not Unlike Myself.

27 Tuesday Nov 2012

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Back when I was on the cusp of real adulthood – having just turned 20 – and really discovering my tastes and interests a girlband burst onto the scene that managed to harness everything I was looking for musically. That band was Girls Aloud. And that was back when I used to scan the British Top 40 for songs to pilfer from Limewire. Many things have changed in the intervening decade but one thing has remained unwavering:

GIRLS ALOUD ARE AMAZING.

From the moment the surf guitar riff opens Sound of the Underground you knew you had stumbled onto something special, but this was a reality tv band!? Could they sustain that kind of amazingness? THE ANSWER IS YES. With the release of followup single No Good Advice The Aloud allayed any fears that they were just a one hit wonder and went about tackling a chart largely dominated at the time by guitars.

For much of the time in the early years the Girls struggled, but I remained with them. They persevered despite the world largely ignoring the earth-shattering amazingness that was, and is, Biology. They stuck around doing dodgy dance routines on morning television as “serious music” became de rigueur on the charts.

What I am saying here is that their struggles were my struggles. More than any other group Girls Aloud are the soundtrack of my adulthood. They were with me through dodgy attempts at pulling, drunken walks home, days on the beach, road trips, job interviews, and everything inbetween.

That is has been ten years since Girls Aloud first formed is quite a shock actually. It seems both too long and so short. On the one hand, I can hardly remember a time that I didn’t turn to Some Kind of Miracle for a little pick-me-up or Biology when I want to get my clock-dance on. On the other hand, and perhaps moreso than my actual 30th birthday, Girls Aloud Ten has reminded me that my 20s are over. I am more officially than ever an adult.

Something else I think of when I get a little maudlin? The graceful swan that is Nadine Coyle and her imitable assortment of camera ready poses and facial pulls.

The 10 years of Girls Aloud is the decade in which I became a proper adult. We share initials, dance moves, and a whole lotta history.

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내가 제일 잘 나가 (It’s K-Pop O’Clock!)

23 Thursday Aug 2012

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I quite love how a genre of music can bubble under for years and then all of a sudden – in quite a zeitgeisty way – it’s the top of everyone’s minds seemingly at the same time. Such, for me, is K-Pop at the minute. I am well aware that Korean’s have been banging out pop music for ages but in a moment of confluence the current crop of K-Popstars seem perfectly aligned with the kind of music that is lighting up the charts the world over, aka EDM. (No, not Edmonton, electronic dance music)

The first K-Pop song to really get my auditory juices flowing was Volume Up by the above pictured 4Minute. What really amazes me about this is not just the song, which is a proper dance-pop stormer, but also the image and how on-trend it is. Sliding comfortably into a pop venn diagram amid the likes of Lady Gaga, Nicki Minaj and The Saturdays there is no reason that this song couldn’t be a smash, other than the admittedly moderately impairing – language barrier. Also, how great is this album cover?

Not only does the above video shine with the kind of budget Girls Aloud would’ve murdered for it teems with a kind of Vampire-y, gothicness that is very on trend without feeling desperate. Also, these Koreans know how to break down a middle eight! And finally, as Britney will tell you, you can never go wrong with a snake.

Next up are the above pictured 2NE1 whose recent single I Love You is a pretty dancefloor friendly bit of electronic pop music that manages to wedge in a Gaga-style spoken word intro and a bit of a rap in the middle eight. It has a sort of thudding propulsing energy that is quite hard to resist in any language. Yet again the video is a total triumph.

If I had to pick one element that really makes this music video it would be FAKE SNOW!! And a woman standing in the snow with an umbrella! How is that helping? Amazing! Oh, and for some reason a lighthouse. I really don’t know what’s supposed to be going on but I’m enjoying every minute of it. Fantastic.

2NE1 recently made their North American concert debut and word on the street is style-challenged goatee fan Will.i.am is working with them on bringing out their first English language single. Exciting news indeed. Hopefully the arrival on 2NE1 on our shores opens the floodgates and K-Pop begins its rightful cultural ascendance. Hurrah!

On Playslists.

26 Thursday Apr 2012

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I have a confession to make. I’m a bit obsessed with making playlists. There’s nary an occasions for which I can’t spend a serious amount of time creating the perfect playlist. For my upcoming sojourn to Europe, for example, I am currently working on myriad playlists including, BEACH (relax), BEACH (party), AEROPLANE and TRAVEL. I strongly believe that a great playlist can make or break a moment. My aeroplane playlist, for example, contains songs that are positive and a bit uplifting – as nobody wants to be depressed on a ten hour flight – but are carefully selected not to be too upbeat, as anything with a high BPM might encourage me to dance thereby making me feel fidgety and trapped. Careful planning, indeed.

Even something as simple as a night in with friends needs a playlist based on whether the night will be spent at home or is the precursor to going out, and also depends on the attendants. I’m devoted to playlisting the way others are to religion. I just can’t trust iTunes Genius to make a truly genius playlist. I mean, yes, the songs are related to and might often be played together but genius can never truly capture the feeling I want to capture with each playlist. For the TRAVEL playlist for example, I imagine walking through an airport with sunglasses on listening to each song. This might not be a thing that actually happens, but that is the feeling I want to capture for myself as I listen to it. I also have a playlist for when it’s windy out; in creating that I imagined my hair flowing wildly in the wind while walking up the street. While everyone knows I love to good walk I’m not sure I’ve ever had enough hair to be described as flowing, and definitely not wildly. Again though, not the point, the point is that how I want to feel in that moment and that’s when you know you’ve got a truly great playlist. Also Girls Aloud.

On a bit of a sidenote I have a playlist of my top 100 played songs, which has come to be know as the #EPIC100, and least played song now sits at 85 plays. That means there are 100 songs I’ve listened to more than 85 times! Frankly that seems like a lot even to me. Interestingly, Alphabeat and Pet Shop Boys are the only male vocalists in the lot. Oh, and Boy George as a part of Mark Ronson’s Business International. Popjustice where obviously laying down some #TRUTH when they noted that the best pop songs are always sung by women. Well-played as usual Popjustice.

The Meme To End All Memes!!!1!!1! #BABE

08 Sunday Apr 2012

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As is customary in this go go 21st century world in which we live, I occasionally partake in evenings that set out to be merely a quick get together with friends and quickly devolve into “youtube parties.” I have spent many a pleasant evening at my friends’ Ryan and Bobby’s place watching endless Celine Dion – “C’Mon girlfriend shook me!” – or similar fabulous videos.

One video with which we’ve become completely enamoured is Girls Aloud’s performance of The Promise on The X Factor. It really is the clip that keeps on giving. At first we became transfixed with the beauty that is Nadine Coyle and her Carry On-style over-acting, the best moment of which comes at [0:37] with her ramming “BABE!” down our throats, but her odd hairography at [2:28] is also brilliant and her open-mouthed belting at [3:31] is again divine. Sarah is amazing simply in her ability to stand during her solos. The woman looks like she Winehoused her way to the studio and I don’t think even she would sincerely describe herself as a “walking primrose.”

Cheryl’s best bit is her dodgy solo [1:00] from which the floor seems to drop out as her voice drops lower and lower while Kimberly drops some tinny realness on us at [2:55] although she has some pretty epic serious-face at [2:08]. Nicola is unsurprisingly perfect throughout, not least during her flawless if too short solo at [2:14].

Other highlights include some seriously dodgy choreography the best of which is what can only be described as a “hand flap” featured at [1:19]. The fingers crossed “promise” move is also pretty legendary and who could forget the pyro-key change at [3:18]? There’s also some great Dannii Minogue bitch-face at [1:53].

This video has everything. Needless to say Bobby, Ryan, and I have learned the complete choreography.

Back to my original point though, this video needs to be a meme. Not just a rick-rolling I’m-sending-you-this-ridiculous-but-frankly-amazing-video-when-you-were-searching-for-something-else meme either. I envisage the pinnacle of the video – BABE! – inserted into the climax of every video on youtube! Imagine: “I’m the king of the… BABE!,” “Imma let you finish but… BABE!,” or a cat falls of a table and then… BABE! So good right!

SATURDAYS IN WINTER WEAR SHOCKER!

21 Monday Nov 2011

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As you may or may not be aware The Saturdays are a British girl group that have been around since the relatively pop-barren times of 2007. They have historically been a bit shit.

All that began to change last year however with the release of banging summer hit – and Popjustice 20 Quid Music Prize winning – single, Higher (dodgy choreography alert).

Being honest I’ve never really liked The Saturdays. There’s something not particularly endearing about them. Despite never being massive they’ve never really captured that underdog spirit that the Spice Girls somehow managed to continue harnessing despite conquering the aural world. It feels a bit like some hot girls got together and formed a band. That doesn’t really make any sense but nonetheless there’s something unspontaneous about The Saturdays and it’s not just that they’re manufactured, they just don’t seem to have been able to get past that feeling-wise.

Or maybe “it’s all about the music” as Emma Bunton once said.

Baby has a point. As much as I’m loath to admit it The Saturdays have been winning me over with their nonstop pop onslaught of amazing. They followed up Higher with the listenable, if not completely amazing, Notorious and then they really kicked things into high gear with the completely and unarguably amazing Xenomania produced All Fired Up.

At this point I was all “OK ladies, you’ve got my attention, where can you take it from here?”

But take me they did, to the snow-dappled shores of a Northern plain and the ballad-o-clock stormer that is My Heart Takes Over.

This song/video combo is as inspired as the last taking The Saturdays effortlessly from summer stomper to winter power ballad. Although I do feel a bit bad for Rochelle, clearly getting stuck with the worst solo backdrop in which to warble her bits of the song.

I have decided that my favourite Saturday is Vanessa who gets all the best bits vocally, followed by Frankie who has the best hair and the most fierce posing skills. My least favourite is Una who clearly thinks she is the star of the group what with all the excessive use of seriousface and group-differentiated poses. The other two I like but don’t love. Such is the normal order of things.

The latest news from Saturdayland is that the girls have been signed to a reality show on E! and will be trying to crack America in the coming year, which perhaps explains the huge amount of money clearly being poured into this album campaign (for the fantastically named On Your Radar). While it seems strange to me that The Saturdays should be the next big British girl band (TM Louis Walsh) to make it big Stateside and not Girls Aloud, I guess that’s what you get for going on indefinite hiatus.

2 out of 3 Ain’t Bad

19 Sunday Jun 2011

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Having recently returned from a massive sojourn across Europe you might expect my first post back to about the conviviality of the Scottish people or the cheapness of beer in Portugal. You might even expect a post about the recent riots here in Vancouver and the subsequent heartwarming cleanup effort.

On all counts you would be wrong. I am nothing if not addicted to popular culture like a mainline heroine addict.

Find me a vein y’all because some serious pop culture exploded last week! It did so in the form of three new music videos from pop royalty: Nicola Roberts (amazing), Lady Gaga (amazing), and Robyn (amazing). However only two of them are any good and the Gaga video is frankly utter shite. Let’s have a look shall we?

1. Nicola Roberts “Beat of my Drum”

Click here to view.

The arrival of Nicola Roberts as a bona fide solo star has in no way disappointed! This video is killer! The off-kilter backup dancers! Nicola’s outfits! The hair flip! The side-ponytail! PERFECTION! This really is a note-perfect video, having that indescribable kernel of affect, you want to watch it again and again. A-

2. Lady Gaga “Edge of Glory”

This really is an abortion of a video. Such a fantastic song wasted. Lady Gaga is a woman with the resources to simply reshoot a video if there are problems (as was reported) and yet she has allowed this monstrosity into the world. FOR SHAME. I’m all for a more simple video but this plain sucks. Edge of Glory is such a euphoric song but this video GOES NOWHERE. F

3. Robyn “Call Your Girlfriend”

The reigning queen of pop perfection has done it again as the zeitgeist seems to just keep on flowing from her bleach blonde bowl cut. Basically this is just Robyn dancing around a warehouse with some light effects and somehow Ms. Carlsson manages to make that not just watchable but captivating. It doesn’t hurt that the song is ridiculously good either. That she is not the most massive thing on the planet is complete nonsense. A-

More on my trip later, including coming out to my Nanna to which she did not make this face:

A Truly Momentous Week in the World of Pop

15 Sunday May 2011

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As the sun sets on the week ending May 15, 2011 one can’t help but contemplate what has turned out to be an absolutely massive week for pop music. There are rare occasions in popular culture when things just sort of hit a nexus point and you can sense something special in the air. We have just experienced such an occurrence. Two major events unfolded in the world of pop music this week that look to have significant ongoing repercussions.

The first of these 2 events is the official unveiling of Nicola Roberts as a solo star. You may remember Nicola Roberts as my favourite member of Girls Aloud. She’s the sour-faced pop princess with the ginger barnet and looks set to take the world by storm if new single Beat Of My Drum is anything to go by:

She has a new website, twitter, and ridiculously good artwork in the wings for her debut single (see below). I really do have high hopes attached to Ms. Roberts and while the odd Cheryl Cole track is a bit of stormer – one cannot deny the genius of Fight For This Love – she will always go for the biggest audience first and you really get the sense with Nicola that the music trumps any target demographic. Amazing.

The other piece of priority pop news this week is the arrival of Lady Gaga’s best ever song: The Edge of Glory. Words cannot accurately describe the amazingness of Gaga’s latest masterpiece and while I’m not always her biggest fan one cannot deny the musical legacy Gaga has created in a few short years. The Edge of Glory bests it all, even Bad Romance (gasp!). It is the perfect marriage of bleary-eyed sad dance, inspirational feel good 90s, and pumping, driving, RedOne synths. In a word: AMAZING.

In a strange confluence of these two events – and perhaps to acknowledge this epic week in pop history- Nicola Roberts interviewed Lady Gaga yesterday for MTV UK. Coincidence? I THINK NOT. Also, here’s a picture of them together. Nice.

It’s all gone a bit tits up for Lilo

07 Wednesday Jul 2010

Posted by in celebrity, television

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As you may already be aware, Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to 90 days in prison today for various fuck ups and idiocy. THIS IS AMAZING! After years of excuses and bullshit someone finally told Lilo to STEP THE FUCK OFF. It’s all excuses excuses excuses with this bitch. It’s like no matter how cute you were in Mean Girls (shout out!) you can’t just run off to Cannes and get completely shitfaced when you have a court appointment. And working with children in Morocco? Who does Lilo think she’s kidding? Unless she knows some underage drug dealers she wasn’t doing any “work” with the children of North Africa.

In case you haven’t already had the pleasure, dlisted has a great run-down of everything including amazing video footage that someone needs to jigger up on Youtube to Girls Aloud’s “Crocodile Tears” which would literally be AMAZING.

The only bit of #TRUTH that Lilo lays down here is when she says regarding her career: “it’s something I’ve worked for my entire life.” Disregarding her loose definition of the word “work,” you know Dina Lohan’s had this bitch working since she was old enough to be off the umbilical cord. In fact, just the other week dlisted (again) had an amazing piece – proving once again that the apple never falls far from the tree – about Dina’s run-in with US-based ice cream purveyor Carvel.

Basically, Carvel gave Lindsay a special VIP card for free ice cream which Dina took control of and started abusing so much that Carvel actually stepped in and STOPPED HER FROM USING IT. Now, corporations don’t want to get involved in high publicity cases like these when they can afford it, so can you imagine how much ice cream Dina must have been stockpiling for them to revoke the card?

After more than six months of numerous and large orders for ice cream, we finally had to cut off the card and take it back.

That sounds like a lot of ice cream to me. And I LOVE THAT DINA CALLED THE POLICE TO HAVE THE CARD RETURNED. You wonder how someone ends up like Lindsay Lohan and you have to look no further than the overly coifed hair of Dina Lohan, the ultimate momager and shirker of responsibility. Going through life as though something is owed to her and nothing is her fault, then raising her children, not only to believe the same, but treating them more like a paycheque than anything. FOR SHAME DINA LOHAN.

Also, as a random sidenote, I was watching Marketplace the other day, which I love, and during an episode regarding the absolute shite that is Herbal Magic – Reader’s Digest version: steer well clear – a woman said that her time with Herbal Magic was “the worst experience of her life.”

Seriously?

This woman, a mother of two, had spent something like $3000 and this was the worst experience of her life?

Honestly, if losing $3000 to a diet company is the worst experience of your life THEN YOU SHOULD THANK YOUR LUCKY STARS THAT YOUR LIFE THUSFAR IS SO F*CKING AMAZING! #TRUTH

I seem to have used far more expletives and CAPS than I had originally intended in this post but I suppise that’s life.

random celebrity news and some swiss-style justice

08 Friday Jan 2010

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1. REVENGE PREGNANCY

I love this! A revenge pregnancy? Fantastic! Imagine if people actually had revenge pregnancies? Jo-Ann, for one, would never stop being pregnant. Also, why does anyone still care about Jennifer Aniston? Strange.

2. Heather Mills: ‘I may skate on one leg’

Seriously? Heather Mills? How is she still even remotely famous? She’s taking part in British reality-based programme “Dancing on Ice.” The only reason this show had previously been on my radar at all is that it’s where Girls Aloud first performed “Untouchable” last year. Needless to say it looks incredibly tacky.

3. Stylist explains Kate Gosselin’s new look

How is this newsworthy even in the loosely fact based world of “celebrity news?” Also, why does her look need explaining? Because she looks like shit? But she looked like shit before, just with shorter hair. Ugh, why are people interested in this woman? DAMN YOU MIDDLE AMERICA!

4. Report: Swiss Ferrari driver hit with record $290,000 speeding fine

So I like to keep up to date on automotive news via Autoblog and the other day this story came up about a man getting a huge speeding fine in Switzerland. Apparently in Switzerland speed fines are based on your income rather that just being a standard amount. I love this! So because this gentleman is a multi-millionaire he got a HUGE fine. I wish speeding fines were this way in Canada, too. It totally makes sense. Standard fines basically means that if you have enough money you can got as fast as you want because $100 is pittance to someone with $27 million in the bank. Well played Switzerland, well played.

it’s pointless list time! the top 33.5 singles of 2009

07 Thursday Jan 2010

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Let’s be honest, 2009 was a fantastic year for music. Here are the top 33 singles of the 2009. Note that I am not saying my favourite 33 singles as my judgement is universal and irrefutable. TRUTH!

Oh, and, as I have mentioned many times previously, pop is definitely back.

1. In For the Kill – La Roux
2. Shark in the Water – VV Brown
3. Bad Romance – Lady Gaga
4. New In Town – Little Boots
5. Happy – Leona Lewis
6. Heartbreak (Make Me a Dancer) – Freemasons feat. Sophie Ellis-Bextor
7. When Love Takes Over – David Guetta feat. Kelly Rowland
8. Fixin To Thrill – Dragonette
9. Cocaine Trade – Christian Hansen & The Autistics
10. I’m Not Your Toy – La Roux

In For The Kill is far and away the best song of the year, although I still prefer the original leaked version to the one that went on to dominate airwaves in the UK. Shark in the Water is a song that deserves so much more love than it received during its less than stellar chart run and really is amazing in every possible way. While it was supposed to be the year of Little Boots her thunder was rather stolen by the aforementioned La Roux and the explosion of Gaga, with Bad Romance being far and away her greatest track to date. A couple of Canadian entries at 8 and 9 with the indomitable Dragonette and Big Onion heroes The Autistics.

Interestingly, or not, four of the top five acts have names beginning with L. Leona Lewis was clearly hoping that by utilising a double L – and celebrity alphabet game reversing – name she would be well in for the top spot but she didn’t (x) factor in the fact that she has no personality which undoubtedly hurts her chances.

11. Fight for this Love – Cheryl Cole
12. Untouchable – Girls Aloud
13. I Gotta Feelin – Black Eyed Peas
14. The Fear – Lily Allen
15. My Life Would Suck Without You – Kelly Clarkson
16. Bulletproof – La Roux
17. Party In the USA – M***y C***s
18. Earthquake – Little Boots
19. Shining Light – Annie Lennox
20. Halo – Beyonce
21. Pick Up The Phone – Dragonette
22. Meet Me Halfway – Black Eyed Peas

Girls Aloud’s rather unfortunate single edit of the over 6 minute epic that is Untouchable is the only reason that release didn’t crack the top 10 and Lily Allen’s The Fear proved that the gobby little shit is actually a real talent that can craft a killer pop song – what’s all this talk of her retiring? Also, what the fuck happened to the Black Eyed Peas this year? I’d always sort of enjoyed them (Shut Up, etc.) on the periphery but this year they blew up with the killer I Gotta Feelin – LA HEIM! – and Meet Me Halfway. Also, Beyonce’s Halo is EPIC.

23. The Spell – Alphabeat
24. Anthonio – Annie
25. Paparazzi – Lady Gaga
26. Into The Clouds – The Sound of Arrows
27. She Wolf – Shakira
28. Remedy – Little Boots
29. Love etc. – Pet Shop Boys
30. Want – Natalie Imbruglia
31. Keep Your Head Up – Girls Can’t Catch
32. Battlefield – Jordin Sparks
33. Straight Through My Heart – Backstreet Boys

Honourable Mention:

Don’t Stop Believin’ – Glee Cast

The Glee cast recording of Don’t Stop Believin’ is probably in my top 5 recordings of the year but I don’t technically consider it a single so I’m leaving it here at the bottom. Separate but better than anything from Leona down.