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I was shopping for swim trunks the other day [sidenote: I got made fun of at work for using the word “swimmers”] and was struck by the seismic shift that has gone seemingly unnoticed in men’s bathing attire. I first noticed this trend a few years back but it has seemingly only accelerated from there.

It seems that as board shorts overshadow regular trunks in popularity so disappears the mesh pouch that I’m used to keeping my tackle in order.

It’s actually a struggle now trying to find attractive trunks that still have the mesh. I’m not sure if I’m hopelessly old-fashioned but I like to know where everything is when I’m swimming, and therefore continue to be a fan of the lining. I’m rather worried there will be day in the not too distant future when I can no longer find bemeshed trunks and will be forced to flop idly about as I frolic on the beach.

Or perhaps I will have to conform to the square leg swim suits worn by all the popular gays (and Daniel Craig, below). I’m not sure I have quite the figure for that style of suit – modesty being ever our watch word in editorial – but it would undoubtedly keep everything in place.

Until that day I will continue to scour various swimwear establishments in search of the perfect pair of trunks with mesh still intact.

DAMN YOU SURFERS AND YOUR FREE-WHEELIN, FREEBALLIN, ATTITUDE TOWARDS LIFE AND SWIMWEAR.

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